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In my mind the story really begins on Friday evening. We decided to do a little impromptu celebrating and go out to dinner since it would most likely be the last time we'd be a three-person family. We ended up picking IHOP and the three of us had a wonderful and fun time together. Abby was perfectly behaved and enjoyed the rare experience of eating out. In fact, several times she looked around and said "church, church" and I think that she assumed we were at church since she was in the same kind of high chair that our church has and that is just about the only place we eat other than home and my parents! Too funny! Afterwards, we walked over to Walgreen's to pick up a couple things and ended up playing in one of the aisles with an extra large bouncy ball. Abby loved it. Unfortunately, we don't have any pictures, but it will always be a very special memory for me as our last outing as a one-child family.
Saturday dawned bright and sunny, with me wondering, "Will this be the day?" While we waited baby's arrival, we headed downtown to the annual Wooden Boat Festival. We had a good time and ran into several people we knew. When they asked when I was due, I had fun saying, "Yesterday!" It's not often the due date is in the past!
That afternoon I took a nap during Abby's nap and when I awoke I was having a few contractions (around 4:30pm). I didn't think too much of it since I had been having Braxton Hicks contractions for weeks, even months. But as I got up and moved around, drank water and had dinner, the contractions didn't subside so I began to wonder if it was time. Kevin's brother and nephew dropped by and asked if Kevin want to go play frisbee golf at Yauger Park with them. I told Kevin that I was beginning to think this was really it, so maybe he should stick around. He brushed it off, saying that there'd been too many false alarms for him to think these contractions were the real ones. I reminded him that this time it was a day past my due date, but it didn't change his mind. =) So, while Kevin went to play frisbee golf, my mom and Abby and I walked over to the park next to our house.
One fat mama ready to pop!
Stopping to blow a dandelion on the way to the park.
The contractions continued to increase in frequency and starting getting a bit worse, so I finally decided that I really was in labor. Additionally, these felt slightly different than the Braxton Hicks - they seemed to start down low instead of at the top of my uterus like all the others before had. My mom encouraged me to go lie down, but I wanted to enjoy the beautiful spring evening in case I was to be stuck inside the hospital for days like I had been with Abby. Finally, Kevin arrived back home and we sent my mom home, thinking that it would be hours and probably not until the next morning before the baby would arrive. But by the time we put Abby to bed just before 10pm, I was having to use my breathing techniques to work through the contractions and some were as close as 3 minutes apart (others were as far apart as 10-15). So, we called my mom back over so she could sleep here with Abby while we headed off to the hospital.
We arrived at the ER at 10:45pm. Kevin was again disappointed that he didn't get to wheel me into the hospital (with my first pregnancy, my water broke but I was having no contractions when we went to the hospital and with this one it felt better to be standing up during the contractions), but the receptionist did make Kevin wheel me up to the maternity ward even though I didn't want it - hospital protocol apparently. We got settled into a room by 11:15. My contractions somewhat subsided while we were checking in and I think that the two nurses on shift didn't think I was really in labor. They did a test to see if my water had broke (I wasn't sure, but had thought it had been slowly leaking), and after about a 15-20 minute wait the result came back negative. They checked my cervix around midnight and I was only 3cm. They told me they'd check me again in about an hour and then they basically left Kevin and me alone.
I stayed on my feet, rocking my hips back and forth like the nurse suggested, hoping to get baby to move down the birth canal since the major problem with Abby had been the fact that she never descended and thus had to come out cesarean. The contractions quickly got worse and within a half-hour I was in some incredible pain, way worse than what I'd remembered with Abby. I'd gotten an epidural with Abby at around 6cm, but I was planning to wait until 8 or 9cm with this baby, as my doctor suggested, in order to better my chances of no complications (my main fear was the pushing part, not the contractions). So, I labored away with Kevin trying to remind to do my breathing and me squeezing his hand until it was blue. =)
Another half-hour later and I felt like I was dying. Assuming that I would have labor until at least morning as this was my first vaginal delivery, I began to think that there was no way I could last until 8 cm for my epidural. As I gasped for breath between contractions that were almost constant, I asked the nurse, "So, these are supposed to get a lot worse before the end, right?" "Yep," was the answer. She told me I could go ahead and holler through the contractions if it would help and not to feel badly about it since there was only one other patient there and she had already delivered and was way down the hallway with her door closed. I couldn't imagine much worse pain. And I knew my determination to hold out for the epidural as long as possible wouldn't last much longer. As the contractions ripped through my body, I began to feel something different. I didn't recognize it at first as that need to begin pushing like you read about in the pregnancy books, but I knew something had changed. I thought to myself that there was no way I could be getting even somewhat close to the pushing stage since it'd only been an hour since they first checked me at 3cm. But something was different and I knew this pain was much worse than what the nurses or Kevin thought I was in. I thought to myself, "Was it possible the baby was really ready to come out? Could it be that I fully dilated already and they are wrong in thinking I have a long ways to go?" I wished the nurses would hurry up and check me again. A couple contractions later, I couldn't stand it any longer and I hollered out loud enough for the nurses to hear at the station, "The baby is coming!" That got their attention pretty quickly. =)
It was about 1:10am and the first nurse came right in and said she'd go ahead and do the cervix check, which was way not fun since my contractions were pretty much constant by then. She said, "Hmmm....I'm going to get the other nurse to get a second opinion." I gasped, "Why? Because there's been no progression, or because it's a lot farther than you thought?" She said, "Because I think you're at an 8 or a 9." My instant reply was, "Then call the anesthesiologist!!" The second nurse checked and confirmed I was dilated to 9 centimeters. She told some assistant-type person (not a nurse per se, but the only other person in the maternity ward at the time) to call the doctor and tell her to come right away. Then she turned toward me and told me to start pushing, not with all my might but strong pushes to start working the baby down and stretching the cervix. She held one leg and Kevin held my other, as I gave my first push during the next contraction (the time was around 1:15am). I was a little bit freaking out now that I realized my suspicions were correct and that the baby was indeed soon going to make his appearance. It was at this point that I had my first inkling that it was going to be too late for the epidural and I was more than a little concerned.
The next few minutes are a blur in my mind. It took almost my full concentration to work through the contractions and push with them, and I was only semi-aware of all the activity going on around me. All kinds of changes were made to my bed and the room to prepare it for delivery. I vaguely recall one of the nurses confirming with Kevin that he was my husband and then shoved all kinds of paperwork at him to sign since they hadn't finished admitting me yet (obviously, they weren't sure I had been truly in labor, even though I knew I was!). I heard the assistant come into the room and tell the nurses that the doctor wished to speak to one of them on the phone back at the main desk. One nurse replied, "We're not leaving this room!" Wow. That made me realize this baby was coming soon, very soon, and I wondered how many times these nurses had delivered babies without a doctor present....
Amazingly, the pushing was not as hard as I expected. It was difficult, it was painful, it was nearly an impossible feat, but it was not as bad as having contractions and not pushing. At least that's how it was for me (I know it's different for every woman). It was like I finally had a job to do and I could work with the contractions, rather than just grit my teeth in pain while I tortured through them. I did have a problem trying to remember to breath (how in the world are you supposed to breath when you are pushing with all your might and experiencing the worst pain you've ever felt? =), and they had to put an oxygen mask on me for a few minutes as there was a scare for a bit about mine and the baby's heart rate. But as I said before, everything around me was out of focus, almost like a dream. I was only semi-aware of them even putting the mask on and I honestly wasn't even worried like they all were about the heart rates. I could only think about the contraction, pushing, waiting a few seconds, telling them the next contraction was coming, etc.
Somewhere during all this pushing my water broke. Between a contraction, all of a sudden I felt an urge and I said fearfully, "Um, I think I have to poop!" Seriously, that's what it felt like, but then a contraction started, I pushed and *pop* my water burst and shot at least seven or eight feet across the room and splatted onto the wall. Pretty crazy. Kevin thought it was awesome (the best part of the labor, he says =) and was surprised at the sheer volume of fluid that came out. The nurses later told us that that happens fairly rarely (1% or less). I was just happy no one was standing at the foot of the bed at the moment it occurred and I think they are too. =)
About a half-hour after I began pushing, the doctor finally arrived (the anesthesiologist had already arrived and was outside the room, but it was obviously too late at that point). She hurried right in, put her gown on and got a few tools together. I was pushing through another contraction at the time and as she glanced at me, she told me to stop pushing. She quickly got her gloves on and then told me to push again. I think I did that maybe one or two times and then she told me to stop. I was confused and asked why and she said so she could suction the baby's mouth and nose out. I was like, huh? Kevin said to me, "The head is already out." I couldn't believe it! It dawned on me that the job was pretty much over, the hardest part was done! I couldn't believe that I'd pushed a baby's head out and didn't even know it! Another moment or two, and I pushed baby Ben all the way out. At 1:50am on Mother's Day, Benjamin Isaac was born. A few minutes later, the placenta was delivered and then the doctor began sewing me up. My job was finally done. Entire labor from first contraction to birth: just over 9 hours. Pushing time: approximately a half-hour.
I was pretty excited. I couldn't believe that I, one of the biggest wimps around who cannot even stand the thought of pain, actually delivered a baby with no drugs whatsoever! Kevin and I were also excited that I saved us a bunch of money by not having to get the epidural (we just made our last payment this month on Abby's labor and delivery bill - c-sections are very expensive). The doctor continued to sew me up and talked to me about my tear. She told me that it was pretty bad, a third degree tear (to the rectum, but not through it), and told me it would be pretty painful. I kind of brushed her off, thinking that it would be nothing compared to the pain I went through recovering from the c-section. Boy, was I wrong! Dozens and dozens of sitz baths later, lots of painkillers the first few weeks, witch hazel pads, ice packs, ointments and creams, etc, etc and I'm still not completely healed! I just had yet another doctor's appointment yesterday that will hopefully be the last. There is one spot that just doesn't seem to want to close up, but finally looks like it may heal by itself without further intervention. The doctor said 2-4 more weeks and I should finally be good to go. If not, she'll probably have to suture it but hopes it will heal on its own as suturing at this point will mean guaranteed infection. Ugh. It's been a long, hard road to recovery, not to mention all our difficulties with breastfeeding to boot.
We left the hospital that evening around 8:30pm. I didn't really want to leave yet, but we were trying to save money and thought that if I was cleared we should head home as soon as possible (can you tell Abby's hospital and doctor bill left a lasting impression on us? =). Maybe next time (IF there is a next time!) I'll find an even cheaper way....home birth anyone? Nah, just kidding - that's not for me. But now that I've successfully had a vaginal delivery I'm open to trying a midwife and birthing center or something like that. We'll see!
So there you have it! Ben's birth story at last! Sorry to keep you all waiting! ;o)
I stayed on my feet, rocking my hips back and forth like the nurse suggested, hoping to get baby to move down the birth canal since the major problem with Abby had been the fact that she never descended and thus had to come out cesarean. The contractions quickly got worse and within a half-hour I was in some incredible pain, way worse than what I'd remembered with Abby. I'd gotten an epidural with Abby at around 6cm, but I was planning to wait until 8 or 9cm with this baby, as my doctor suggested, in order to better my chances of no complications (my main fear was the pushing part, not the contractions). So, I labored away with Kevin trying to remind to do my breathing and me squeezing his hand until it was blue. =)
Another half-hour later and I felt like I was dying. Assuming that I would have labor until at least morning as this was my first vaginal delivery, I began to think that there was no way I could last until 8 cm for my epidural. As I gasped for breath between contractions that were almost constant, I asked the nurse, "So, these are supposed to get a lot worse before the end, right?" "Yep," was the answer. She told me I could go ahead and holler through the contractions if it would help and not to feel badly about it since there was only one other patient there and she had already delivered and was way down the hallway with her door closed. I couldn't imagine much worse pain. And I knew my determination to hold out for the epidural as long as possible wouldn't last much longer. As the contractions ripped through my body, I began to feel something different. I didn't recognize it at first as that need to begin pushing like you read about in the pregnancy books, but I knew something had changed. I thought to myself that there was no way I could be getting even somewhat close to the pushing stage since it'd only been an hour since they first checked me at 3cm. But something was different and I knew this pain was much worse than what the nurses or Kevin thought I was in. I thought to myself, "Was it possible the baby was really ready to come out? Could it be that I fully dilated already and they are wrong in thinking I have a long ways to go?" I wished the nurses would hurry up and check me again. A couple contractions later, I couldn't stand it any longer and I hollered out loud enough for the nurses to hear at the station, "The baby is coming!" That got their attention pretty quickly. =)
It was about 1:10am and the first nurse came right in and said she'd go ahead and do the cervix check, which was way not fun since my contractions were pretty much constant by then. She said, "Hmmm....I'm going to get the other nurse to get a second opinion." I gasped, "Why? Because there's been no progression, or because it's a lot farther than you thought?" She said, "Because I think you're at an 8 or a 9." My instant reply was, "Then call the anesthesiologist!!" The second nurse checked and confirmed I was dilated to 9 centimeters. She told some assistant-type person (not a nurse per se, but the only other person in the maternity ward at the time) to call the doctor and tell her to come right away. Then she turned toward me and told me to start pushing, not with all my might but strong pushes to start working the baby down and stretching the cervix. She held one leg and Kevin held my other, as I gave my first push during the next contraction (the time was around 1:15am). I was a little bit freaking out now that I realized my suspicions were correct and that the baby was indeed soon going to make his appearance. It was at this point that I had my first inkling that it was going to be too late for the epidural and I was more than a little concerned.
The next few minutes are a blur in my mind. It took almost my full concentration to work through the contractions and push with them, and I was only semi-aware of all the activity going on around me. All kinds of changes were made to my bed and the room to prepare it for delivery. I vaguely recall one of the nurses confirming with Kevin that he was my husband and then shoved all kinds of paperwork at him to sign since they hadn't finished admitting me yet (obviously, they weren't sure I had been truly in labor, even though I knew I was!). I heard the assistant come into the room and tell the nurses that the doctor wished to speak to one of them on the phone back at the main desk. One nurse replied, "We're not leaving this room!" Wow. That made me realize this baby was coming soon, very soon, and I wondered how many times these nurses had delivered babies without a doctor present....
Amazingly, the pushing was not as hard as I expected. It was difficult, it was painful, it was nearly an impossible feat, but it was not as bad as having contractions and not pushing. At least that's how it was for me (I know it's different for every woman). It was like I finally had a job to do and I could work with the contractions, rather than just grit my teeth in pain while I tortured through them. I did have a problem trying to remember to breath (how in the world are you supposed to breath when you are pushing with all your might and experiencing the worst pain you've ever felt? =), and they had to put an oxygen mask on me for a few minutes as there was a scare for a bit about mine and the baby's heart rate. But as I said before, everything around me was out of focus, almost like a dream. I was only semi-aware of them even putting the mask on and I honestly wasn't even worried like they all were about the heart rates. I could only think about the contraction, pushing, waiting a few seconds, telling them the next contraction was coming, etc.
Somewhere during all this pushing my water broke. Between a contraction, all of a sudden I felt an urge and I said fearfully, "Um, I think I have to poop!" Seriously, that's what it felt like, but then a contraction started, I pushed and *pop* my water burst and shot at least seven or eight feet across the room and splatted onto the wall. Pretty crazy. Kevin thought it was awesome (the best part of the labor, he says =) and was surprised at the sheer volume of fluid that came out. The nurses later told us that that happens fairly rarely (1% or less). I was just happy no one was standing at the foot of the bed at the moment it occurred and I think they are too. =)
About a half-hour after I began pushing, the doctor finally arrived (the anesthesiologist had already arrived and was outside the room, but it was obviously too late at that point). She hurried right in, put her gown on and got a few tools together. I was pushing through another contraction at the time and as she glanced at me, she told me to stop pushing. She quickly got her gloves on and then told me to push again. I think I did that maybe one or two times and then she told me to stop. I was confused and asked why and she said so she could suction the baby's mouth and nose out. I was like, huh? Kevin said to me, "The head is already out." I couldn't believe it! It dawned on me that the job was pretty much over, the hardest part was done! I couldn't believe that I'd pushed a baby's head out and didn't even know it! Another moment or two, and I pushed baby Ben all the way out. At 1:50am on Mother's Day, Benjamin Isaac was born. A few minutes later, the placenta was delivered and then the doctor began sewing me up. My job was finally done. Entire labor from first contraction to birth: just over 9 hours. Pushing time: approximately a half-hour.
I was pretty excited. I couldn't believe that I, one of the biggest wimps around who cannot even stand the thought of pain, actually delivered a baby with no drugs whatsoever! Kevin and I were also excited that I saved us a bunch of money by not having to get the epidural (we just made our last payment this month on Abby's labor and delivery bill - c-sections are very expensive). The doctor continued to sew me up and talked to me about my tear. She told me that it was pretty bad, a third degree tear (to the rectum, but not through it), and told me it would be pretty painful. I kind of brushed her off, thinking that it would be nothing compared to the pain I went through recovering from the c-section. Boy, was I wrong! Dozens and dozens of sitz baths later, lots of painkillers the first few weeks, witch hazel pads, ice packs, ointments and creams, etc, etc and I'm still not completely healed! I just had yet another doctor's appointment yesterday that will hopefully be the last. There is one spot that just doesn't seem to want to close up, but finally looks like it may heal by itself without further intervention. The doctor said 2-4 more weeks and I should finally be good to go. If not, she'll probably have to suture it but hopes it will heal on its own as suturing at this point will mean guaranteed infection. Ugh. It's been a long, hard road to recovery, not to mention all our difficulties with breastfeeding to boot.
We left the hospital that evening around 8:30pm. I didn't really want to leave yet, but we were trying to save money and thought that if I was cleared we should head home as soon as possible (can you tell Abby's hospital and doctor bill left a lasting impression on us? =). Maybe next time (IF there is a next time!) I'll find an even cheaper way....home birth anyone? Nah, just kidding - that's not for me. But now that I've successfully had a vaginal delivery I'm open to trying a midwife and birthing center or something like that. We'll see!
So there you have it! Ben's birth story at last! Sorry to keep you all waiting! ;o)
8 comments:
Yay! Finally the story :) I love (natural) birth stories. :) I am so happy for you-to have had a successful vaginal birth. I think it's so amazing to do it with no drugs-although very, very painful! Tate's was WAY (way!) more painful than Coleson's but I am thinking that has something to do with him being over 9 pounds and a pound a half bigger than his brother :) anyway... Yes, it's much cheaper to go the natural route-a birth center is even cheaper! ;) (Terry likes this!) Congrats again!
Wow, thanks for posting that. I'm so proud of you! That must have been so tough with no one really thinking you were very far along when you were really practically done.
I agree pushing is the easiest and funnest part, but girl you had to do it a long time, poor thing. With #1 I also had 3rd degree tears, I understood then what they ment by the 4th trimester. Yuck. Double yuck.
With labor and delivery so close around the corner, I can literally feel your pain as I read this. Eek. Amazing how it is worth it in the end. I wish someone would warn us poor women about tearing! It is awful to recover from, just plain awful.
PS Jeff bought me diamonds after Mandy was born and we call it the epidural necklace. So sweet for a thrifty guy, but it was WAY cheaper than paying for an epidural :)
So now does Kevin know to trust your instincts when you say "today is the day?" lol :)
I hated being in a wheelchair when I didnt' feel I needed it too.
I know what you mean about the recovery. That was much worse then the labor!
isn't natural childbirth such an empowering experience? nothing else like it!
i remember the pushing part being really short, too...although that sensation is the craziest thing ever. it's like your body takes over...and you're just along for the ride.
and oh my goodness...the tearing. i SO wish someone had described to me how much recovery you have to do...the sitz baths are nice...it's just the pain sitting down, pain standing up too long, pain walking around too much...felicity's boppy was definitely a blessing for me - it's the only thing i could sit on for weeks! ugh...that's the only part of childbirth that makes me think twice.
glad everything went well, though...and thanks for posting ben's birth story...i love hearing birth stories :o]
I was just looking through some pictures yesterday and found a few of newborn Abby...wow so tiny! It's amazing how much she's grown. It was fun to compare her newborn pictures with Ben too. :)
way to go!!!!!!!!!! i was dying laughing a few times. so proud of you- and cool that you got to have this experience, albeit painful one =). i love the standing, rocking the hips back and forth position too. very effective. thanks for the story, you have a great one =)
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